FOR THE LOVE OF PLANTS
And Biophilic Design
A man walks into the lobby of an upscale department store and asks to see the manager. While he waits, the security team keeps a close eye on him. The simple gesture of brushing a lock of hair out of his eyes increases the scrutiny of the guard who is watching behind a bank of cameras.
He zooms in.
Empty Mess is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.
The man waves his arm around over his head. Then he does it again. The manager is at the bottom of the escalator, almost to the lobby. The man suddenly waves both arms around and over his head and almost manages a full circle before the officer tackles him to the ground, along with the contents of the package he is holding. The man lies there … gasping for breath with his cheek smashed into the beige tile floor and what is left of a pink cupcake and plastic kazoo. He manages to utter a single word.
The almost involuntary reaction to the buzzing in your ears can make anyone appear crazy! The scenario makes me laugh every time … and I’m laughing almost every day, but not as the victim ... as the spectator.
It’s been going on for so long now that my husband no longer yells and waves his arms. He’s given up trying to kill the little buzzards. He no longer cares if I witness the harassment. He simply reaches for the can of Deep Woods Off, which he has nestled between the remote control and his latest golf score card on the sofa table on his side of the couch.
For whatever reason, mosquitoes never bother me. I have a friend who says mosquitos prefer type O blood types. I can’t remember what my blood type is, but it obviously isn’t O. I do feel a little guilty—not just because I laugh out loud every time—I just can’t help it! But Deep Woods Off … in the living room no less! But I also laugh because I think I know the source of the problem … my plants.
Decorating with plants is my thing. From cutting arrangements of giant birds of paradise plants and philodendrons, both the standard and variegated varieties, to live pots of ivy or one of my all-time favorites, the anthurium, I place plants in every room. I’ve even been known to use a silk plant to add height and interest to a dark corner where a live plant wouldn’t thrive. Where there’s is no space for a pot, I’ll hang an art piece—of a plant! Plants make it feel like home.
I’ll never own up to knowing that my plants are most likely the source of the bugs—I’m not getting rid of my plants. I bought a pellet to add to the water that’s supposed to stop mosquitoes from breeding and a spray to soak the leaves.
And just when I think it may have worked, I hear the unmistakable blast of the aerosol can. It’s nearly impossible for me to stifle a giggle. The scenario is totally worth it.
I love my plants.