I CAN DO THAT

And I did...I published a book!

This story is included in the “Super Mom” chapter of my new book!

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I CAN DO THAT- first published September, 2022

It’s a disease . . . and I admit that I have it.

I’ve been suffering from it for years. Or it might be more accurate to say that those around me have suffered from it for years. You see, the issue is I think I can do anything.

When the kids were home, we liked to watch the TV show Survivor together. There were very few shows that we could all agree on. It was fun to get grossed out watching the contestants eat bugs and bowls of unidentifiable sludge and to fail at games of skill. I was sure that if I ever had the chance to be on the show, I would win. The same goes for The Amazing Race. On this show, two friends or two family members team up to compete in a race, traveling to exotic locations around the world. I really wanted to enter and compete with my son; I just knew we would win.

He and I have always been good at team competitions. We won every three-legged race we entered. We were pros at tying our feet together and locking our arms. At the sound of the whistle, we took off in perfect unison. We finished so far ahead that we had time to turn around and laugh at the other teams. If we entered The Amazing Race . . . yes . . . we would win.

My husband may suffer from this disease too, and one of our favorite family stories is proof of it. It goes like this: Our son and his friends were riding BMX bikes around the neighborhood and built a small jump. They were having fun riding around in a loop and hitting the jump.

Then my husband said, “You’ll get more air if you pull up on the handlebars.”

The boys didn’t want to do it, so he demonstrated. He got on one of the bikes and began peddling as fast as he could, heading straight for the jump. As he hit the base, he pulled up hard and flipped completely over, landing flat on his back in the middle of the street. We all held our breath until he got up, dusted himself off, and said, “It’s these new bikes. They’re too light.”

Today, even without kids in the house, we like to watch Running Wild with Bear Grylls. On this show, Grylls is a trained survival expert. He invites celebrities to challenge themselves to survive in the wild.

“We could do that,” my husband and I say in unison.

We say this from the comfort of our motion recliners. He with an ice pack on his back, and me with an ice pack perched across both knees. That’s why I say it’s a disease! We both think we could do it.

This disease doesn’t afflict only those who want to compete in challenging games of skill or survival. I have also experienced severe symptoms at home. Need a new paver patio installed? No problem. I’m off to rent a plate compactor. Garbage disposal on the fritz? Clear out the cabinet. I’ll be back with a new unit in a flash. This has gone on for so long that it’s hard to imagine that life is any other way.

A good friend said to me, “Just because you can doesn’t mean you have to.”

This is a foreign concept to me, and I’m thinking, “If I don’t, who will? And how long will it take?”

I indulge her for a minute. Then I smile and say, “You’re probably right.”

But what I’m thinking is, “I can do that.”

Empty Mess: Rediscovering Life After Kids is available now! A compilation of over 100 reflective and humorous stories. Click image for more.