MISSIONARY BARBIE

And overpacking confessions.

When I said it out loud … responding to the question, “Why are you going to Africa?” … my answer seemed selfish.

I wrote weeks earlier that my attempts to fix myself (e.g., to recover from my unexpected reaction to the kids leaving the nest) were taking an awfully long time. I knew I couldn’t keep doing the same things and expect to come up with different results. I needed to change my routine and shock my system out of the doldrums that had become too comfortable. I was going to Africa because … I needed time to think.

With inspirational views like this, thinking will be easy…right?

To be honest, I wasn’t sure what I would encounter in Africa. The news reported civil unrest and children going hungry—two things that are happening right now in America, too. My fellow missionaries, who had made the trip several times, spoke of the amazing countryside and welcoming people, and how simple things—things we all take for granted—could make a real difference in their lives. I was clinging to that idealism when I renewed my passport.

We had to drive Frank, my old pickup truck, to the airport because we had so much luggage. Each of us was allowed three bags, which was quite an upgrade from my recent commitment to pack everything into a personal carry-on item to avoid paying the airline fees. Just so I don’t sound like a complete prima donna, I want to let you know that one of my bags was filled with art supplies and fabric for the classes I planned to teach. As we stood in line in the international departures queue, Secretary Kristi Noem, aka “ICE Barbie,” recited the rules in a video that looped continually on overhead screens. I liked that she was still herself. She’s tough but not trying to be a man.

But secretly, I hoped that I wouldn’t be Missionary Barbie. Not that I was going to stop wearing makeup; I’ve put on makeup every day before leaving the house for forty years. I’m not ready to become the Little House on the Prairie version of myself, so I wasn’t going to forego the foundation, lipstick, and mascara.

Feeling fortified with my new compression socks, noise canceling headphones, oversized neck pillow, sleep mask, and my “Stay Healthy While Flying” kit of sanitizing wipes, nose spray, eye drops, and Emergen-C packets, I boarded the plane for the 15-hour flight with confidence …the longest flight I had ever taken. In coach.

You can say what you’re thinking. Nobody will mistake anyone in that getup for Missionary Barbie!