NEW ADVENTURES

Not evil conspiracies...

The instructions were simple … “Don’t bump the board.”

And yet, the board was bumped into at least three times before we finished eating. It was holding up one side of the pergola roof that was sagging, and when the board was bumped, the entire structure shifted wildly. My nephew held one hand over his head, which made cutting his steak a little difficult. One more season … that was my goal. Get one more season out of the pergola before tearing it down and replacing it. However, that dinner may have changed my mind.

Would this make you nervous?

It’s not easy for me to admit, but I was a little nervous that the pergola might come crashing down while we were seated under it. I was nervous because I’m the one responsible for fixing stuff around the house.

After taking a quick look around, I could see that the pergola wasn’t the only thing in need of repair. I’m not sure when it happened, but there are more things that are broken than seemingly possible. I’d like to blame a widespread conspiracy that has been perpetrated on consumers.

Doesn’t it seem like products are actually designed to fall apart after a year? Gone are the Maytag appliance commercials showing the lonely repair man with nothing to do. I’m sure we never replaced a refrigerator or a washing machine when I was a kid. Since things don’t seem to last like that anymore, there may be some truth that this predicament is being caused by the evil conspiracy of built-in obsolescence. But there’s also an alternate reality that may be to blame … at some point, I just stopped fixing stuff!

And here’s where the true predicament comes in. I like to fix things, and I find it nearly impossible to call someone to repair items that I know how to repair myself! It almost feels like I’m replacing myself. AND even more, like I’m adding to the list of things, I can no longer do now that I’m getting older.

That list includes things like back-country helicopter skiing, running a marathon, and driving a car in a NASCAR race, which are things I may have never actually been able to do, but it also includes things like changing my own flat tire and rollerblading, which are two things I have done but would think twice about doing now.

However, something happened recently that is helping me rethink my stance. I hired a painter to paint my house! I know you’re probably thinking—Who the heck paints their own house? Well, I do … or at least, I did. I painted my first house, a two-story townhouse, which meant that I spent half the time perched high on a ladder while I was painting. And then, a few years later, I painted our current house.

Flash forward fifteen years, and it’s just like the condition of our pergola. Our house was past the time it should have been painted, and I broke down and called a professional. In two weeks, he did what would have taken me two months—or maybe more—to do myself.

And you know what? Today, as I’m lounging poolside admiring my freshly painted house, it occurs to me that I won’t be spending every weekend of my summer painting … and that feels great!

It’s not as if I’m throwing in the towel. It’s just the opposite; I feel empowered!

Just because I can doesn’t mean I have to. I know I’ve said that before, but this time, it feels different. I used to think that doing everything myself made me feel capable. Now, I realize it just made me feel tired—and a bit irritable. Maybe letting go of doing it all myself isn’t a sign of giving up or an inevitable product of aging.

Maybe it’s a sign that I’m making space for new adventures.